those who are in the like distress, since they may conceive hopes of being no longer miserable in this kind, while there is yet alive so able an oculist as Dr. Grant. Quid, si quis vultu torvo ferus, et pede nudo, HOR. Ep. 19. 1. 1. v. 12. Suppose a man the coarsest gown should wear, "SIR, TO THE SPECTATOR, CREECH "I AM now in the country, and employ most of my time in reading or thinking upon what I have read. Your paper comes constantly down to me, and it affects me so much, that I find my thoughts run into your way; and I recommend to you a subject upon which you have not yet touched, and that is, the satisfaction some men seem to take in their imperfections, I think one may call it glorying in their insufficiency; a certain great author is of opinion it is the contrary to envy, though perhaps it may proceed from it. Nothing is so common as to hear men of this sort, speaking of themselves, add to their own merit (as they think,) by impairing it in praising themselves for their defects, freely allowing they commit some few frivolous errors, in order to be esteemed persons of uncommon talents and great qualifications. They are generally professing an injudicious neglect of dancing, fencing, and riding, as also an unjust contempt for travelling and the modern languages; as for their part (say they,) they never valued or troubled their heads about them. This panegyrical satire on themselves certainly is worthy of your animadversion. I have known one of these gentlemen think himself obliged to forget the day of an appointment, and sometimes even that you spoke to him; and when you see them, they hope you will pardon them, for they have the worst memory in the world. One of them started up the other day in some confusion, and said, Now I think on't, I am to meet Mr. Mortmain the attorney about some business; but whether it is today, or to-morrow, faith I cannot tell. Now, to my certain knowledge, he knew his time to a moment, and was there accordingly. These forgetful persons have, to heighten their crime, generally the best memories of any people, as I have found out by their remembering sometimes through inadvertency. Two or three of them that I know can say most of our modern tragedies by heart. I asked a gentleman the other day, that is famous for a good carver, (at which acquisition he is out of countenance, imagining it may detract from some of his more essential qualifications,) to help me to something that was near him; but he excused himself, and blushing told me, Of all things he could never carve in his life; though it can be proved upon him, that he cuts up, disjoints, cause. and uncases with incomparable dexterity. I would not be understood as if I thought it laudable for a man of quality and fortune to rival the acquisitions of artificers, and endeavor to excel in little handy qualities; no, I argue only against being ashamed at what is really praiseworthy. As these pretences to ingenuity show themselves several ways, you will often see a man of this temper ashamed to be clean, and setting up for wit only from negligence in his habit. Now I am upon this head, I cannot help observing also upon a very different folly proceeding from the same As these above-mentioned arise from affecting an equality with men of greater talents from having the same faults, there are others that would come at a parallel with those above them, by possessing little advantages which they want. I heard a young man not long ago, who has sense, comfort himself in his ignorance of Greek, Hebrew, and the Orientals; at the same time that he published his aversion to those languages, he said, that the knowledge of them was rather a diminution than an advancement of a man's character; though at the same time I know he languishes and repines he is not master of them himself. Whenever I take any of these fine persons, thus detracting from what they do not understand, I tell them I will complain to you, and say, I am sure you will not allow it an exception against a thing, that he who contemns it is an ignorant in it. "I am, Sir, "Your most humble servant, "MR. SPECTATOR, "S. T." "I am a man of a very good estate, and am honorably in love. I hope you will allow, when the ulti mate purpose is honest, there may be, without trespass against innocence, some toying by the way. People of condition are perhaps too distant and formal on these occasions; but however that is, I am to confess to you, that I have writ some verses to atone for my offence. You professed authors are a little severe upon us, who write like gentlemen; but if you are a friend to love, you will insert my poem. You cannot imagine how much service it will do me with my fair one, as well as reputation with all my friends, to have something of mine in the Spectator. My crime was, that I snatched a kiss, and my poetical excuse as follows: Tis by this cunning I contrive, In spite of your unkind reserve, To keep my famish'd love alive, 'Which you inhumanly would starve. Your humble servant, < TIMOTHY STANZA." "SIR, Aug. 23, 1712. Having a little time upon my hands, I could not think of bestowing it better than in writing an epistle to the Spectator, which I now do, and am, "Sir, "Your humble servant, "BOB SHORT. "P. S. If you approve of my style, I am likely enough to become your correspondent. I desire your opinion of it. I design it for that way of writing called by the judicious the familiar." T "BEING of the number of those that have lately retired from the centre of business and pleasure, my uneasiness in the country, where I am, arises rather from the society than the solitude of it. To be obliged to receive and return visits from and to a circle of neighbors, who, through diversity of agè or inclination, can neither be entertaining or serviceable to us, is a vile loss of time, and a slavery, from which a man should deliver himself if possible; for |